WHO IS LUM? (OR, WHAT IS A "LUM"?)

A collection of LUMs form one sector of The Interdimensional Extraterrestrial Time Travelers Society.

Standing (generally) nine feet tall and enveloped in a coat made of feathers, fur, and a cotton-like substance, they are benevolent creatures who spend their days roaming free, at random in either:

A. parallel universes

B. higher dimensions (within our own universe) or

C. other periods of “time” altogether.

Time is in quotations because what is time anyway? Because they spend their days wandering through planes of existence we’re unable to perceive, LUMs are invisible to the naked human eye (unless you have a SIGHTSEER of course, but I’ll get to that momentarily). A LUM chooses where and when to exist based on where and when they are most needed, and only the LUM itself can make that decision. The fact of the matter is, you might be surrounded by LUMS at this very moment and not know it.

Anyone can summon a LUM simply by calling out the word: “LUM”. Either one or two will appear right away if they believe your circumstances call for their presence. If you concentrate really hard whilst calling out “LUM”, you might beckon a whole family of LUMs, doubling, or even tripling their desired effects. The invisible presence of LUMs might cause a human being to experience the following:

1. Finding things you’ve previously been missing. LUMs have an uncanny (and quite useful) ability to bring attention to forgotten objects or thoughts. They have three eyes, one large and two small. The large eye is called a SIGHTSEER and is able to see across at least two higher dimensions (or universes/realities) simultaneously, as well as the present time. The latter pair of eyes beneath the SIGHTSEER (no one knows the name of these) are able to see across future and past. They see the beginning of everything and the end of it all (that is to say, if there even is a beginning and end to it all, who is to know besides the LUMs). If you summon a LUM and they find you interesting (and kind at heart), they will find whatever it is you’ve been missing and place it right in front of your nose. Their presence also prevents whatever you might have lost from being misplaced or forgotten.

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2. Empathizing with very tiny creatures. A spider walking across a kitchen counter has an unbelievably low chance at survival if it catches the attention of a nearby human being. If a LUM is present, or within at least a two mile radius, human beings will choose to help arachnids by bringing them to comfortable ceiling corners or outside gardens. There have even been reports of human beings leading ants to nearby breadcrumbs and awarding mice leftover cheese. For reasons unbeknownst to us, mosquitos are excluded from this anomaly.

3. An aversion to confrontation and peaceful demeanor. LUMs are unable to fight or bicker, and they lack the ability to feel anxious or overwhelmed. It’s just not in their nature or DNA (although we only suspect this since we’ve never actually gotten hold of any LUM-DNA). We do know that their neural oscillations are able to project across every temporal and dimensional axis, which in turn overrides the LUM-caller’s bio-electrical impulses. Those fortunate enough to be in a LUM’s presence will experience a state of deep equilibrium. This is why LUMs are called for most before driving tests, job interviews, family get togethers and tax season.

4.     Luck. LUMs are one of many intelligent beings who are proud to call themselves members of The IETTS. I’ve had the privilege of seeing a LUM with my own mortal eyes only very briefly by concocting my very own SIGHTSEER, hence why I started painting them. You can see an example ABOVE and BELOW.